Let Go

to Improve your Relationships and Your Own Peace of Mind

The most serious problem for any situation; marriage, relationships, businesses, or organizations, are the ones that cannot be discussed openly and honestly, with respect, tolerance, and intelligence.

Charles Tutt

All relationships involve issues of control.

The other person’s approval or disapproval is important within a relationship.

Each party to the relationship often maneuvers to be in control. This control is fluid in a healthy relationship.

Let go:

• Does not mean stop caring. It means I won’t do it for someone else, becuse I want them to learn from the experience.
• Recognizes that I cannot control another person.
• Is to recognize the power in another to control his or her life situation and live with the consequences of his or her behavior.
• Means I will not try to change or blame another.
• Means I will focus on what I can control, my own behavior.
• Means I will be supportive.
• Is not being protective but allowing another to face the reality of life.
• Does not deny the behavior of another, but accepts it.
• Means dealing with the present to create a useful future and not clinging to the past.
• Means fearing less and loving more.
• Means I will search for my own shortcoming and correct them.
• Means I have given myself and you permission to make mistakes and be wrong.
• Means I will not try to adjust everything to fit my desires, but take each moment as it comes.
• Means growth and living for the future.
• Is not scolding, arguing, or nagging.
• Means I will be there for support, advice, and love, but the decisions you make will be your own.
• Is the realization that words like should, must, ought to, need and demandingness are symptoms of my own feeling.
• Is the realization that life is a process and that at any moment everything could change.
• Is knowing the difference between the things I cannot change and those that I can.
• Is the recognition that people are whole and complete and capable of doing whatever they want to do to get what they want.
• Is the true expression of unconditional positive regard.

Inspired by Lloyd Loften. Edited (somewhat) by Charles Tutt